i have:

...this. A vinyl tablecloth. I would aspire to say "oilcloth"--but I got it in the dollar section of target, so I'm pretty sure it's vinyl. This is how it happens: slowly but surely your perfect nest starts to accumulate trinkets on the counter tops, pictures on the refrigerator 2 inches deep, and then this. One day you say, "what I need is a vinyl tablecloth." Well, underneath is a very nice oak table with grooves in it (crumb catchers). And we eat 3 meals a day here. That's a lot of wiping and crumb spillage (which requires a toothpick and about 15 minutes to adequately clean). So, for the sake of my table, and in the interest of time management, we are living with a big yellow vinyl tablecloth. It stood out like a sore thumb for about 2 weeks. Now I think it looks almost friendly.
Sometimes I get the urge to cross stitch ducks, hang up Williamsburg blue curtains, and cook with cream of mushroom soup. So far I've resisted. I go make some tea and have a peek at this:


...and I'm at peace.